He sat up on bed. Sniffling back the tears, he closed his eyes and looked up to the heavens. His hands were clasped together. Occasionally, he wiped his runny nose on his sleeve, like a little boy. In between the sobs and sniffs, he spoke out softly, and fearfully. As if he was begging hard for something more than his life was worth. His body felt weak, and his forehead was burning like wildfire. The cold was making him shiver against his will. He was brewing hot and cold, yet he was numb inside.
His voice was hushed, so light and gentle that it seemed to float and hang in the air. Tears were still trickling; his stomach growled out in hunger. Still, he ignored the physical realm of his surroundings. He needed to connect to a presence, needed to feel something bigger than his body. And then, he touched it. The helm of the reassuring silence. His world was dark, but it was filled with light. Lips trembling, he whispered..
He asked that his father could somehow, be able to enter a state of finacial stability. It pains him to see his father's tired body, and the struggles he had to go through every day. He loved his father. For his sake, and his family's, he prayed for a blessing from above.
He asked that he could strengthen in that few areas of his life. Academically, he aspire to do as well as he did when he was a young boy. Spritually, he wanted the faith and innocence of the little ones. He wanted to do so much more. He didn't want to be a letdown. Not to her, or anyone at all.
Attempting to hold back his sobs, which had now reached an uncontrollable state, he mustered enough strength to whisper out another prayer. "I pray that our relationship will hold steadfast in the midst of storms. And through it all, the stars will shine in our skies again.."
Proceeding to end his prayer, he stopped; hesistated. Deep down, he wanted to ask for one last thing. But.. but should I? He brushed aside these thoughts, and tried again. But once more, he failed. He paused for a long while, and finally whispered his last, final prayer.
"I pray that somehow, she'd know just how much I love her."
By then, he didn't have much time to think about closing his prayer. So exhuasted was his body that he had already drifted off to deep slumber. Trails of his tears that had streamed down his face just moments ago can be seen underneath the dim moonlight that shone through vague opening in the curtains. But despite that, he had already spoken out his innermost wishes.
Slowly, his smile hid his weariness, amidst that peaceful breathing.
posted by cigarettelove @ 5:36 AM
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